How to Be a Bad Girlfriend. Part II, Retreat


Part I

See, I thought I could put up with it and spent a lot of time analyzing if I was imagining the whole thing or somehow being unreasonable in my thoughts. I was trying my best to work on being more accepting of people and acknowledging their feelings and all of that. You know, putting in some effort.

But, anyway, here’s how the crazy went down.

He didn’t have his own place. He lived with a roommate, female, who was pregnant and the father wasn’t around…

Let it sink in. 5, 4. 3. 2. 1…

Yeaaaaaah, I know what you’re thinking, because I was thinking it too.

But what did I care? He wasn’t supposed to be in the running anyway. We got in to a regular groove, but then things began to accelerate, and fast.

About a month in, he told his child about me. Heck, the first time we met he asked me to go with him when he visited where she lived. (Tropical island, somewhere in the Caribbean.) After two months, he didn’t play fair and told me that he loved me during a very passionate, unfair time. Of course I said it back because it happened at an unfair time! *squints*

I had a good thing going. Sue me.

Then he got all weird about things. It got to a point where I would dread going to visit him. He was so depressing! But I kept coming back for the griiiitsssssss, you know?

I was working, a student and then of course my personal responsibilities. Same old stuff that I make clear to people in the beginning. He didn’t like that.

As a matter of fact, he didn’t like anything.


  • Going out anywhere outside of his neighborhood.
  • That I actually had a life, with real adult responsibilities and bills he cannot pay.
  • That I wouldn’t introduce him to my children.
  • My friends really didn’t know about for a very long time.
  • That I didn’t seem excited enough when I would see him.
  • That I wasn’t worried about him enough.
  • That I wouldn’t be friends with his single, pregnant, female roommate.
  • That I never wanted to watch movies with him. (HELLO! It’s the summer time! Neflix and chill is for winter!)
  • Not being a killjoy.
  • Spending money.
  • His father.
  • His ex-wife.
  • Any remotely cool food.
  • Uhm, living?

He was soooo boring, draining and generally difficult.

Now, I’m not the arguing type, but we had gotten in to at least 4 to 5 major disagreements in a 6 month period. He had a penchant for leaving novellas in my text messages like I was his baby moms or something. Just a real deal, hissy fit, grown a$$ man crying in my texts! It was actually mortifying and hysterical at the same time.

As time went on, I continued to get more and more put off by his behavior and things hit the fan when I did not include him in my birthday events. So about a week after that, he sent me some Dead Sea Scroll of a text “breaking up” because I didn’t tell him good night. I tried to be cordial right after, but he behaved rudely. *shrug*

Then two weeks later, I met someone else. Silver lining, eh?

Well, we’ll see about that.


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